I sprinted out the door in my running pants and sweatshirt, hair still pulled tightly in a ponytail from my run earlier that morning. No, I wasn’t heading to a workout class. I was (gasp!) going to dinner with my husband.
I know what some of you are thinking: “You’re going on a dinner date in your running clothes?” And my answer is a resounding “Yes!”
Many of you cannot imagine doing something like this. Most of you probably put on a new outfit, a great pair of heels, and curl your hair. Or take a shower, at the very least. (sigh)
And I would’ve loved to put on my favorite pair of jeans with my high heeled boots.
But on that particular day, we were just thankful to have a quiet dinner without kids. It had been months since we had been on a date, mostly due to our recent adoption, but also because life had been busy. With four kids, it is often difficult to find time for each other.
Our dinner that night was peaceful – we engaged in actual uninterrupted adult conversation and I didn’t have to cut up anyone’s food or pour anyone another cup of juice.
It was perfect.
Just me and Peter.
Alone.
The previous week had been especially hard. Unmet expectations caused me to lash out and we both said some things we shouldn’t have. It wasn’t nice, y’all.
But that’s the way marriage works sometimes, isn’t it? Life gets hectic and stressful and you try to do everything right but you just can’t manage it all. Thankfully, we can usually laugh about our behaviors, knowing we will do better in the future.
But sometimes we need to be reminded that our marriage is good and strong and worth fighting for.
As Valentine’s Day approaches this year, I want to encourage you to spend some time with your spouse.
- Grab a quick dinner without the kids. (Our date literally lasted an hour from the time we left home until the time we returned)
- If date night isn’t an option, order takeout and eat it after the kids go to bed (A couple weeks ago, Peter grabbed burgers from our favorite burger joint and we gorged on them after the kids went to sleep)
- Meet your spouse for lunch
- Take a walk around the neighborhood together
- Participate in a hobby that your spouse loves
Just do something in order to remind each other that you both matter.
Because sometimes life is crazy and busy and you forget all the reasons you fell in love with each other in the first place.
What are some ways you date your spouse, especially in the busy season of parenting?
Hey, I wear running clothes on dates! Especially walking dates. My husband and I will take long, long walks on Saturday mornings. And sometimes he will surprise me and say, let’s grab a bite, just spur of the moment like since the kiddos are old enough now, and I will be wearing my not so good clothes, the ones I would rather not parade out in public in, but he doesn’t want to wait for me to change and get my spiffy on, so I take 3 minutes, run my fingers through my hair, maybe change my shirt and we are gone. Because the most important thing is spending time together. Not impressing the people sitting next to us with my dazzling dress. I agree. We need to remember why we fell in love in the first place.